“Theism is really just a state of a-realism. So atheism is, in the end, the way we are in the first place.”

— Sapienite


Many people are born with theistic inclinations. I happen to be one such person. Before I was taught rules as to what was “right” and “wrong”…

In order to attribute things to gods (deifying them as you said), you would first have to approach them as not-gods. If you had no rules and conceptions of gods given to you, you would not have known them as gods, but as beautifications, as you said (not really theistic, but perhaps more-or-less spiritual). Also, as you said, you had to work out these delusions, and should know them to be so to retain sanity. “Your reality” is a fantasy, therefore a-realistic… And because it’s personal doesn’t make it true; in fact, it’s very easy for our senses to be deceived, or especially for our minds to invent all sorts of unrealities; we have to guard against these unnatural abominations.

You’re right, at first I didn’t know them as gods, but I treated them like gods. What does that mean? I spoke to them like in prayer-like ways, I revered them in innocent ways, and perceived them to move in the landscape— in other words l applied theory of mind to natural and entirely subjective phenomena in such a way that made the whole scene seem “possessed” for lack of a better word, which is what people naturally do if left to their own devices oftentimes. I was a just a kid.

However, when I was old enough to know what temples were for, I wanted to build temples to video game characters and other divine beings that I perceived, and revered. It kind of went from there, the evolution of the significance of all of these beings and things, but it all had to do with my feeling that there was something very real, significant, powerful, and central to my life behind all of them.

This wasn’t delusional behavior, but rather natural behavior that inherently theistic people may exhibit. These tendencies didn’t point to any objective truths, but there were consequences for suppressing them, like never feeling in touch, at peace, or at home with the things that actually stood some chance of helping me to grow into myself. (When I finally accepted that I had gods I finally felt like I was able to achieve some sense of self-assuredness.)

They aren’t delusions, and calling them such is highly disrespectful, like calling the fact that I don’t fully identify as woman or female delusional is disrespectful. These are all things that I need, for reasons which people who don’t need them cannot fathom.

My reality is not a fantasy. I am less in denial and more myself than ever before. 

And, I’m sorry, I’m losing it at “unnatural abominations”, like… I don’t know what highbrow uberrational antitheistic trope pool you fished that from, but it’s probably one that I’ve fished in myself a few times back when I thought that self-denial for science was the bomb.



I have been an atheist my whole life. I was raised with no direct faith education and three out of four of my siblings are on the atheist-agnostic gradient. (My youngest brother goes to church twice a week.)

And I have been that asshole who has been unkind to theists. I absolutely was that person when I was a teenager,and it lingered in college.

But let me tell you something. I am really, really jealous of their faith, their community, and the relationship they have with their god(s). Atheism is lonely. I think theism can be very beautiful. I don’t tolerate cruelty to people who have a beautiful relationship in their life just because I understand it.

Wow. Thank you for your honesty, and thank you for calling it a gradient!! I’ve been on the theistic gradient my whole life, and it always brought me into conflict with atheists and rationalists. I see it as something entirely personal, like I have a dimension to my being that natural atheists don’t have. 

Also, I’m sorry that you feel lonely. I’m not familiar with the experiences of people who are on the atheistic spectrum, so I don’t know if it’s something that could be pretended away, say by talking to a favorite fictional character in place of a god?

The loneliness of atheism was always awful for me…



“Theism is really just a state of a-realism. So atheism is, in the end, the way we are in the first place.”

— Sapienite


Many people are born with theistic inclinations. I happen to be one such person. Before I was taught rules as to what was “right” and “wrong” to deify I turned a lot of things into gods, including natural features and video game characters. It wasn’t a-realism– it was *my* reality, my own personal landscape. Without realizing it I declared, “This is god-like and therefore I call it a god,” kind of like some people would say, “This is beautiful, and so it defines what is beautiful for me.” It was always just a different dimension of perception for me, but it was one that I had to work with in order to find some semblance of sanity in the end.

Theism is personal. Every theist’s theism is different, and the more it is their own the better.


This Circumgender Thing


Yo, I might upset some people, but can I just ask…

Am I the only one who sees this whole circumgender from a third angle? I understand why trans women are upset. It’s problematic for an AFAB person to claim “trans woman” 

But at the same time, I think this ignorant teenager was just trying to come up with a description of what she felt but is still used to thinking in binary terms (she’s young, she needs more time to overcome and unlearn things) and therefore her attempt failed. Communication was lost and it upset a lot of people. 

That said, lemme explain something about my own gender. I’m AFAB. For now I consider myself genderfluid. Sometimes I feel like a guy. Sometimes I feel like a girl. Sometimes I don’t feel like anything. Sometimes I feel like a mix of things. It might have to do with my mental states/illness. But I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. 

Regardless, long before I became ill, I wanted a penis. I wanted a puberty with testosterone later on. But I’ve always wanted a penis. 

Is there a name for someone who just wants different anatomy but would ideally still be the gender they were assigned at birth? 
(I completely see the problem with this though, because that means there could be people saying “I wish I had been born intersex” and that would be waaay not cool. Or what if there was someone who just wants to modify their body? I think they should be allowed to do so. But are they still trans? Currently they still have to go through the loopholes…)

That’s not cis, because I have dysphoria about my body and I want a “masculine” one. 

But I’d never call myself a trans woman. That belongs to trans women only. 

So that’s my thoughts on it. Maybe I’ll write something a little longer, tomorrow

I don’t know a name for that, but that’s a very good question! 

aidenofizalith and I were interpreting the word “circumgender” to mean one who deviates from their assigned sex/gender at birth, but then later on embraces it. It didn’t seem like that would become a widely-accepted meaning for “circumgender” anytime soon, but it got me thinking and speaking out about the lack of an adequate term for that.

I’m glad that, despite everything, people are opening up over this and discussing overlooked identities, or gender-related phenomena that presently lack names. I look forward to reading more about this!

Can everyone just take a look at this post for a sec?

Apologies for spamming the tags over this, I’m just really upset, and the linked posed above is the first post I’ve seen that speculates about an innocent and ridiculously endearing intention behind what everyone else jumped on as inexcusable, evil appropriation.

This is the most heartening thing to come out of this debacle, at least that I’ve seen… <3







*this term was reclaimed from a truscum, and its name was changed because it was ableist.*

circum is latin for ‘around’ or ‘in a circle’ meaning that our gender is a circle that goes around, for example; from cafab to feeling like you should have been born camab to transition to female. 

circumgirl - someone who identifies as a trans woman but was cafab

circumboy - someone who identifies as a trans man but was camab

circumgender - anyone who identifies as trans but was assigned “cis” at birth

circumgirls identify as someone who is transitioning from male to female and we believe that we should have been born male so that we could be trans women and vise versa for circumoys.

this means that we are not cis and should not be identified as such. we are trans! we do not agree with our gender assigned at birth and we should have been assigned a different gender so that we could identify as trans. 

i also need a new flag for this gender since i dont want the flag to be associated with truscum :/

Are. You. Fucking. Kidding.

What in the everliving fuck. And how is this not massively offensive to the identities and struggles of trans people?

This is cute. Please don’t say mean things to this kid. This is silly and basically just envy of transgender people (which in itself is surprising) but maybe she just wishes she had a penis. I’ve met more than one cisgender girl who wished she was a trans girl. I think they fail to understand the stress most transgender people feel, and assume it would be nice to have a body like ours.

We are proud and beautiful and cis kids are going to admire us. That’s amazing when you think about it. So don’t be mean to some little girl who wants to be like the trans women she admires.

It’s fine to be cis and wish you were trans, and that gender marker is kind of a cute way to say that. But our lives are usually difficult and full of stress because we are trans, so we are going to be confused or angry about this sort of thing.
Fellow transgender people don’t go shaking your heads at our fans for looking up to us.

This is the most heartening post I think I’ve seen throughout this whole debacle.

This is the only post I’ve seen that saw innocent intention behind what everyone else jumped on as appropriation.

Maybe there were others, but they were grossly outnumbered.

I was thinking that maybe there were past gender struggles that she wasn’t letting on, because that’s what I’ve seen more people go through, and to some extent have gone through myself during the times when there was more pressure for me to be more feminine. But, this sounds likely, and frankly endearing as hell.

Whatever the innocent intention was behind it, once that was brought to light I’m sure a better understanding could have been reached.

What happened tonight did not have to happen. 

I’m going to go back to looking at puppies now.


Holy shit I’ve seen anti-truscum and tucutes make posts telling truscum to harass the person who made circumgender. For fucks sakes they’re 13 y/o, didn’t know better, apologised, and actually were harassed by truscum to the point where they self harmed heavily and are bleeding out severely bc they cut a major artery.

They posted pics of their wrist bleeding so unless they’re really fucking good at faking blood that shit’s legit.

For fucks sakes you ppl are malicious goddamn…

Here’s what I want to know:

Before people jumped on her, did they ask why she felt like “circumgender” was a good idea? Did people ask for her story? Or did they just assume that what she was doing was awful appropriation? Did they try to understand that her perspective wasn’t being fully communicated in the confusion? Did they try to appreciate where she was coming from? Did they try to help her to better communicate why she felt the way she felt? Of course not.

This is how people get silenced, and hurt, emotionally and physically. This is how people get taught that who they are isn’t valid. This is how people get taught to not be themselves, because if they mess up at all there will be hell to pay.